Humor: Update Status Facebook Dengan Tri

Kejadian ini bermula ketika secara tak sengaja aku berpapasan dengan tukang Mie Ayam keliling yang biasa beredar di depan rumah. Siang itu, kulihat dia tengah berasyik masyuk di pinggir jalan, cekikikan sambil melihat sesuatu yang ada di tangannya. Bahkan saking asiknya, gerobak mie ayam itu ditinggalkannya begitu saja, seakan mengundang pemulung jail untuk mengangkutnya

Karena penasaran, diriku pun bertanya…

“Mas Jason…” (panggil saja demikian, karena dia sering dipanggil Son ama pelanggannya) “Son… mie ayamnya siji maning sooon…, sedang apa kok asik bener di pojokan?” tanyaku.

“Eh mas ganteng… (satu hal yang aku suka dari Jason adalah: Orangnya suka bicara Jujur!), ini mas, lagi update status!!…”

WADEZIG!!!

“Weehhh… njenengan fesbukan juga to??” tanyaku heran.

“Ya iyalah mas… hareee geneee ga fesbukan?!? Lagian kan lumayan juga buat menjaring pelanggan lewat fesbuk, kata pak Hermawan Kertajaya kan dalam berdagang kita harus selalu melakukan diferensiasi termasuk dalam hal pemasaran mas…”

GLEK!! Kalah gw! Gw yang sering naik Kereta ke jawa aja gak tau kalo ada yang namanya Hermawan Kereta Jaya.

“Emang mas statusnya apa?” tanyaku penasaran.

“Nih mas aku bacain: Promo Mie Ayam, beli dua gratis satu mangkok, beli tiga gratis nambah kuah, beli empat gratis timbang badan… takutnya anda obesitas… segera saya tunggu di gang Jengkol, depan tengkulak Beras Mpok Hepi. Mie Ayam Jason : Melayani dengan Hati… ampela, usus dan jeroan ayam lainnya…”

GUBRAK!!!

Dua kosong untuk mas Jason…

Gw yang udah lama fesbukan aja gak bisa bikin status se-atraktif dia.

Tapi ada yang aneh pas kulirik ke henpon yang dia pake, aku kira henponnya blekberi atau minimal nokia seri baru yang uda bisa pake internetan. Selidik punya selidik, ternyataa… henponnya lawas bin jadul… HP yang masih monokrom, suara belum poliponik, dan masih pake antena luar kayak radio AM.

“Mas, tapi kok bisa update fesbuk pake henpon sederhana gitu? (bahasa halusnya henpon lawas) Gimana caranya??”

“Owwh… gampang mas, saya tinggal nulis statusnya lewat SMS lalu kirim ke Tri?” jawab dia datar.

“Ohh… mas nya pake Kartu Three ya? Yang gratis internetan itu?”

“Bukaaaan mas, Tri itu lengkapnya Tri Ambarwati… Dia itu pacar saya, sama-sama dari Tegal, yang kerjaannya jagain Warnet 24 Jam! Jadi kalo butuh update, tinggal sms dia aja nanti dia yang gantiin status saya, lha wong dia tiap hari di depan komputer jagain warnet. Paling sebagai balesannya saya gratisin mie ayam seminggu sekali… murah to…”

Mendadak kepalaku pusing…

Bagaikan menderita dehidrasi akut sekaligus hipotermia tingkat tiga, aku limbung mendengar jawaban spektakuler dari mas Jason…

BRUK!!

“Lho mas… mas… jadi beli mie ayam ndak… kepriben iki?”

MAU UPDATE STATUS GRATIS?
PAKE TRI!
MAU???
(ketawa.Com/AS)

Humor: Mencari Ayam yang Kabur

Anak seorang petani pergi ke pasar dengan membawa kotak berisi ayam atas perintah ayahnya. Dalam perjalanan, tiba-tiba kotak itu jatuh, dan pintunya terbuka. Akhirnya ayam dari dalam kotak itu kabur keluar dan lari menyebar ke segala arah.

Akhirnya anak tersebut ke lingkungan sekitar dan mencoba memasukkan ayam-ayam yang lari ke dalam kotak yang sudah diperbaiki dan menjualnya ke pasar, lalu berjalan pulang sambil ketakutan jika nanti akan dimarahi ayahnya.

"Yah, ayam-ayamnya tadi sempat kabur semua," katanya, "Tapi saya sudah berusaha mencari dan cuma ketemu 12 ekor dan ini uang hasil penjualan ayamnya..."

"Hmm, kamu memang anak yang hebat..." kata si petani, "Padahal tadi kamu ayah titipi 7 ekor..."
(ketawa.Com/AS)

Humor: Nilai Rapot Merah Semua

Cerita ini mengisahkan seorang anak yang memperlihatkan nilai laporan sekolahnya ke pada bapakknya,

Joni : "Pak, Joni sudah dibagi rapot..."

Bapak : "Udah di bagi rapot? Coba bapak liat..."

Joni : "Tuh di meja pak, ambil saja."

Bapak : "Coba bapak liat... Waduhhh kamu ini Joni jadi anak bodo banget masa nilai di rapot kamu merah semua. Kalau begini Bapak percuma sekolahin kamu!!!" (dengan penuh emosi dan amarah yang meledak-ledak)


Joni : "Pak Pak sebentar dulu..." (bingung) "Masa sih pak, nilai Joni kan bagus semua gak ada yang merah..." (agak emosi dan takut dan aneh)

Bapak : "Terus ini warna apa? Bukan warna merahhhhh??!!"

IJoni : "Coba Mana Liat!! Waduhhhhh kok banyak merahnya yaaa padahal tadi di sekolah gak ada merahnya sumpah deh, Pak.."

Bapak : "Ah, kamu ini alasan!!"

Joni : "Ehh, sebentar. Kok ini rapot laporan tahun 1989, taun sekarang kan tahun 2010... Coba lihat dulu sampul depannya ini rapot siapa. Yeee ini mah RAPOT BAPAK WAKTU DULU..."

Bapak : "???"
(ketawa.Com/AS)

Whew...

...down down..deeper down. Just finished another couple of sections of 'THE INSANITY II' and all I gotta say is, this is some scary sh*t coming out of my brain and onto the medium we all know and love called Flash here. Tell you what guys if you want to have cozy dreams don't sit on your computer alone drawing pics of half-eaten bodies with their intestines hanging out...
Anyway, I need a break so I thought I'd blog for a sec before I get out the guitar.


I don't suppose I'll ever spend as much time authoring any games as I have with the Insanity series. But will there be a trilogy? Maybe one day. But 6 months is really way too long to spend on making a game. What's the point? I definitely need to cut them shorter. With story-intensive games like this one there's really no choice but still...One worry I do have is fitting this all in under 5 mb. I can't see it happening what with all the audio that has to go in at the end, so there might be some restrictions in that capacity.

Anyway, 2011 will be my year for multiple game releases- you can bank on that.

I want to wrap this puppy up because I'm DYING to code a decent beat-em up. I've been doing *ahem* research? on MAME recently and some of the golden oldies, Crimefighters, Shadow of Mystara, Aliens vs Predator. Man, thems some good games and I'm bagging to get my imprint on the legacy of great fighting games.
I quit playing Tekken 6 because frankly the game isn't that much of a challenge, I think my Eddie is retired at around position 170 in the world so, can't complain. Back on MGO again with a level 14 girl character called 'THE INSANITY' (surprise). You wont find me on the UK servers but if you ever go on the Japanese ones feel free to friend me and we can clan up or something.
I've been checking out some of the new releases on PSN. Brink is looking exciting. Just, dammit, I wish they'd bring out Monster Hunter on the PS3. Even if I have to go through it all in Japanese again like I did on the PS2 I'd be game.

Roma Star Francesco Totti: The Dream Goes On

And ‘Er Pupone’ wants the Giallorossi to live it to the fullest.

Roma captain Francesco Totti has challenged his team-mates to seize the opportunity to win the Serie A title this season.

The Giallorossi are one point behind league leaders Inter with just six games remaining, and Totti writes in his weekly column in Il Corriere dello Sport newspaper: “We got an important win at Bari last Saturday which enables us to dream. And we want to live this dream until the end, giving all we have so that we won’t have any regrets.

“We have been presented with a very big chance. I’m sure that the Olimpico will be sold out again on Sunday, also because of the club’s decision to cut ticket prices which has proved to be a winning policy.”

Roma host Atalanta at the weekend while Inter visit Fiorentina. (goal.Com/AS)

Roma Will Keep Nicolas Burdisso & Luca Toni - Italian Agent

The Giallorossi are likely to keep both stars...

Roma are expected to hold onto Luca Toni and Nicolas Burdisso, says notable Italian football agent Claudio Vigorelli.

The Lupi have enjoyed a stellar season following a number of strategic transfer moves which have paid dividends, in particular those which brought in Toni and Burdisso.

"Roma had an excellent transfer market and I think they will keep all their stars and strengthen the squad," Vigorelli told Calciomercato.it.

Toni and Burdisso are on loan from Bayern Munich and Inter respectively until the end of term, but Vigorelli believes they will extend their sojourn in the capital.

"If they manage to keep Toni and Buridisso then I am sure they will be doing an excellent thing given both players' work-rate there," he concluded. (goal.Com/AS)